For the haters

They say that it has to do with the way you were raised, the way your mother tucked you in at night, the way your father interacted with you as a small child when you would cry in his arms, they say its how you ask for forgiveness.

I've traveled, I've fallen, I've got myself back up again just to be back at the start. It's like a 'lose a turn' card but only in the game of life but this time it is real and you can't just role again next time. This time it's fixed, set, and solid.

I have found ways to beat myself up, take myself down from the material objects that make up my representation of societal markers. I have found ways to turn the crudest of insults into the most graceful tonged words you have ever heard.

Try me, I will bring it.

All this emotion, all this passion but for what for the fight to the finish, who says I want to finish? Who says I have to finish? I feel this pressure to 'be good', this pressure to break myself into this box, this things that I 'must' become. I have heard good reason, I have found it within me to keep going, but don't ever think that this drive is from your lack of interest. Never be confussed that this fire is from something you have done.

May you never see me win.

Poster of a girl

Chuckles in the darkness, no that's just me doing this invisible dance. You see I like you loads, more then most and you bring out the best in my day dreaming 'search for the largest rock to sit on' self.

Lets talk about bliss; its my new jam.I feel this maturity and confidence that I have been missing for such a long time. I found this ability to be to protect myself yet reveal myself. Growth and much more to come.

Ive learned to be open, to take chances and just move with it. She swept me in took my hand and said she liked me, more then just a pretty little thing I cling on to, more then a riveting genius more then a great hair-cut more then exceeding expectation. I was able to look at my map turn it upside down and start walking. Bliss.